Please, Mr Sandman

Once again, sleep is eluding me. I feel tired. My head hurts. I feel like I desperately need sleep, it just wont come.

My insides are still in knots from stress. There has been an offer on my house. It's under contract but I wont know if the buyers finance will come through for another two weeks. The money I may get is less than what I was hoping for, but enough to cover my debts and give me a fresh start. That will have to be good enough. It is too expensive and tiring to continue pursuing anything else.

I should be able to speak to the employment agent about the job I interviewed for in the morning. They have checked my references and want to book me in for a medical which seems like a good sign. The medical is a bit of a worry. Hopefully I make it through.

I am seeing my normal doctor tomorrow so will be able to talk to him about not being able to sleep and what has been going on at work. On Tuesday my brother returns from his six months overseas. I can't wait to see him and hear all about what he has been up to. I have missed him. He is one person who keeps me positive and thinks highly of me, reminds me that there are people that do.

My friends took me out for a wonderful birthday dinner which cheered me up lots. They have so much on their plate at the moment that it is amazing they find time for me. I sincerely wish there was more I could do to help them. It's been a tough couple of years for us all. It is comforting to know that whatever life throws at us, we will deal with it together. It makes things seem less daunting.

Hopefully things will be getting sorted out in the next few weeks. I should know if I am successful with the job application by the end of this week. Then I can quit my current job and serve out my notice, if necessary. A week after that I should know if the sale of the house is going through. That means February will hopefully hold a new job and settlement of the house sale - by the start of March I would be debt free.

I am trying to focus on these things. To hold out and see if things are going to be resolved. The constant low level stress inside is bothering me but I know it will recede once things are organised in my life.

For now I will take it one day at a time. Monday means going to doctor, contacting job agent to book medical and stalling for more leave from my current job. It would be nice to do those things with at least a few hours sleep behind me. Please, Mr Sandman!